What is EFT couples therapy?
What is EFT couples therapy in Charlotte, NC?
Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) is a type of couples therapy that focuses on improving the emotional connection between partners. EFT is based on the premise that most relationship problems stem from a breakdown in emotional communication and understanding between partners. The goal of EFT is to help partners understand and validate each other's emotions, and to help them communicate those emotions in a more effective and positive way.
EFT was developed in the 1980s by Dr. Sue Johnson and Dr. Les Greenberg, who were both practicing psychologists at the time. They based their therapy on attachment theory, which suggests that humans have a natural need for close emotional bonds with others. When these bonds are threatened or disrupted, it can lead to emotional distress and relationship problems.
The EFT model of couples therapy involves three main stages:
De-escalation: In the first stage, the therapist helps the couple identify the negative patterns of interaction that are causing emotional distress. These patterns often involve blame, criticism, and defensiveness. The therapist helps the couple to see how these patterns are contributing to their problems, and works with them to find ways to de-escalate these negative interactions.
Restructuring: In the second stage, the therapist helps the couple to restructure their interactions in a more positive and effective way. This involves teaching them new communication skills, such as active listening and expressing emotions in a non-threatening way. The therapist also helps the couple to understand each other's emotional needs and to find ways to meet those needs in a more positive way.
Consolidation: In the final stage, the therapist helps the couple to consolidate their new relationship patterns and build a more secure emotional connection. This involves helping the couple to identify and overcome any remaining obstacles to their emotional connection, such as unresolved past traumas or ongoing stressors in their lives.
EFT has been shown to be effective in treating a wide range of relationship problems, including communication difficulties, infidelity, and conflict resolution. It is a short-term therapy that typically lasts between 8 and 20 sessions, although this can vary depending on the severity of the couple's problems.
One of the strengths of EFT is its focus on emotions and emotional connection. Many couples experience relationship problems because they have difficulty expressing their emotions to each other, or they feel that their emotions are not validated or understood. EFT helps to address these issues by teaching couples new skills for emotional communication and understanding.
Overall, EFT can be a very effective form of couples therapy for those who are looking to improve their emotional connection and build a more positive and secure relationship. If you and your partner are experiencing relationship difficulties, consider calling or emailing to see if this type of therapy may be right for you.
Josh Burnett is an individual and couples counselor in Charlotte, NC. He has helped many couples, men and women connect with their faith, values, self and others. His big-heart, depth of understanding, and ability to relate, help his clients feel comfortable to share the hard stuff, heal, and grow.